Caffe Milano
3 Prte de Bâle, 68100 Mulhouse, France
Click right to take a look around…
I knew the first day that I arrived in Mulhouse—within the first few hours even—what this place is: a man cave. It’s a little deceptive given the large windows, face-lit channel letters, and a lack of smoke, but it doesn’t take long to make peace with the absence of estrogen. See, it’s important to acknowledge that the words used were specifically not “testosterone overload.” No, these guys, many bald and commiserating, others keeping it casual in each other’s company, were just occupying the black, high-back vinyl chairs. Oh, don’t get me wrong. You’ve entered their den which means they do have an eye on you, but more in an one-ear-bud-in kind of way. The walls are papered in exposed brick print, and someone has gone ahead and leaned a few canvases against the window facing Rue de Bâle, but its truest colors can be found around the bar. A box shelf is randomly in the wall, supporting a shrunken sea voyager and framing a wood-assembled alligator with a top hat. Square novelty plaques of wildlife shadows grace some of the two-dimensional brick just off to the side of a NeXtime clock featuring Frits Vink’s retro design. The sign for DONI TOURS atop the Lindr two tap, joined above by a flat, teardrop Albania ornament hanging from a shelf with long-stemmed Schweppes glasses just about took me out. There is something so bro about emaciated trinket core, I swear. The soccer game plays on the singular television screen off to the side of the entrance, the only lateral movement save the sweetest, inoffensive individual behind the bar counter. Come to find out that the lack of smoke that I’ve come to expect at a place like this is laughably not a happenstance but by design, made clearly forbidden by laminated INTERDICTION DE VAPOTER and INTERDICTION DE FUMER signs right as you walk in. Depending on who you are and what time of year you visit, there is a very good chance that you’ll see this cafe differently. But one thing’s for sure: there won’t be anything clouding your judgement—well, once you’re inside at least.
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Drink: Grand Cappuccino
It’s Lavazza, which means that it is a hot cup of milk. My pluses are that yes, it was hot; no it didn’t taste bad; and adding a leafy design on top of nothing with chocolate syrup always wins over the heart (should the taste buds be less than amused). The stirrer with CAFE lasered out of one end was also a really cute touch. With a CONTI espresso machine in full operation and some effort obviously exerted, I dare (and dare so happily) say that I can’t report disappointment.
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Price: Grand Cappuccino=2.5€
Hours*: Summer: Monday–Saturday {7:15–23}; Sunday {8–22}; Winter: Monday-Saturday {7:15–22}; Sunday {8–21}
*PRECISELY why I have an hours section. Google is WRONG. And this cafe has a seasonal split that is written in—for god knows what reason—Italian with the French (Horaires/Orari, Ete/Veres, and Hiver/Dimrit).
Extra Notes:
They have all of these QR codes announcing free WIFI along the window. I tried to scan it to no avail. All this to say, maybe there’s WIFI, but you’ll have to ask the bartender.